A Step-by-step Guide To Overcoming Shyness

Trying to overcome shyness can be a real challenge. Shyness is an emotional state that makes you ashamed and that inhibits your behavior.

A shy person does not avoid others. The person mostly likes the company of others and is not afraid of others. In fact, the person is afraid of being exposed and of being in the center.

To be able to get over your shyness, you should understand what it’s all about.

You should also not confuse it with being introverted, because not everyone who is introverted is shy. Shyness is instead a problem that makes you not dare to do things that you would like to do.

What is shyness?

There are three aspects to shyness. First of all, there is an organic aspect. According to this, shyness can be genetic. It can also be caused by anomalies in different types of glands.

There is also a behavioral aspect that means that shyness is a learned behavior and that it usually begins during childhood.

Sometimes it has to do with how a person was brought up and whether the child felt appreciated by his friends or the adults in the environment. It can also occur after abuse.

Psychoanalysis also believes that shyness is a manifestation of an internal conflict. It is associated with the subconscious suppression of one or more instincts.

If a shy person feels exposed, he will think that he has done something wrong and that he can not defend himself. This person may also feel that his reputation has been destroyed.

How to get over shyness step by step

At least 50% of the population categorize themselves as shy. It is a common problem that often leads to discomfort.

Here are some steps to help you get over shyness:

• Identify your shyness. There is a global shyness and a situation-related one. The first occurs constantly. The latter manifests itself only when dealing with certain types of people or situations. Identify the type of shyness you have.
• Learn what causes shyness. Try to remember the times when you felt most ashamed. What was the common denominator in these cases? What are the most influential factors that have made you feel ashamed or embarrassed? Who made you nervous?

A practical guide

If you notice that your shyness prevents you from enjoying life, it may be a good idea to go into therapy. There are many ways to overcome shyness these days.

If, on the other hand, your shyness is not paralyzing, you can always try to move forward by following these strategies:

• Accept your shyness. You have to understand that it is just a trait that some people may even find attractive.
• Define ten situations when this occurs. Make a list of ten social situations that you are most afraid of. It does not matter if they seem stupid or insignificant to you. Try to be specific and concise. For example, when you make a joke and no one laughs.
• Organize your information. Go from a simple situation to a more complex one. For example, when a simple situation does not scare you too much while a more complex one paralyzes you.

Try the following after completing the steps above:

• Dominate your situations. Once you have defined the stressful situations, you start working with them one at a time. Try to expose yourself to similar circumstances to address your fears.
• Sort out what makes you embarrassed. When you start to feel embarrassed, you should stop and note what you think and feel. Do not continue until you understand what you are feeling at the moment.
• Enliven yourself. Improve your posture and do not compare yourself with others. Emphasize your best character traits instead.

Shyness in itself is not a problem. It becomes a problem as it leads to unpleasant feelings that make you not achieve what you want.